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September 14, 2006

Comments

Mark

Thank you for sharing that.....it snet a shiver through me.....she's a wonderful mother and an even better human being.....

Ash

I cried when i read that entry you posted almost a year ago. And yet, you had me almost in tears again this time. Mothers are really special. Yours and mine too. You are the special one Ethan.

I only wish I knew you in real life. Though not romantically.

Arthur

You write magic, Ethan Gray. There's a meme going round around about books at the moment. One of the questions is 'which book do you wish had been written?'. Perhaps the book I hope you are going to write is the answer...

James

Dude, Magic story, so glad it was written by your mum, cause I started to think you were a little bit on yourself with all the beautiful and intelligent comments.

I personally think, if your mum tells it right, that your Dad is the hero of the story... he's the parent we all wanted. Like it was a non-event that you are gay. Awesome Dad.

To Matt, who would rather be back in the closet... dude where are you living? That one comment made me feel like crying more than the story did...

Harv Nagra

Wow, amazing.

Awesome blog, my first visit and I'm a fan. I will be back. :)

Mike

That was just beautiful....beautiful!

Patrick

I...
This was the most beautiful thing I've ever read.
I cried. I broke down, like I haven't in half a year. But they were tears of anguish...

I'm not a model student like you.
I don't have beauty either. [At least in my eyes.]

Just a sister and friends that tell me to be strong and that "Being gay doesn't make the person. Doesn't make who you are."[I guess I couldn't ask for more right now...]

And two very close-minded parents whom I die to tell, and whom:
One could have a heart attack on the spot.
The other would throw me out of the house.
Both huge homophobes.
My friends say "It [being gay] doesn't matter."
But it does. To *them*...
And as much as I tell myself and everybody that I don't care what they think - I do. God, how I do...

I wish I had your strength.
I wish I had your courage.

I don't wish for your life,
but I wish for the above to help me fix mine...

Your words give me that much more of both.

I thank you, from the bottom of my heart for the bit of hope and strength you've just given me.

Thank you.

Kim

Thank you for sharing this. It is such a moving story, beautifully written and full of love.

Micifus Phil

I'm new to your blog but this is such an amazing entry, thank you so much for sharing this. This entry alone has convinced me to become a fan of your blog. Keep up the good work!

Micifus Phil

i_lk_me

Thank you for sharing that. I cried. I know how it felt for you and her. And that's why I can't bear to tell my mother. I've broken her heart once, I couldn't stand to do it again.

mom

My son's boyfriend sent this story to me. It was like I myself had written it. I knew when my son, Robert was 7 that he was going to grow up and be be gay. How you ask? It is something between a mother, and her son. She knows everything about him, what he thinks, what he feels. I saw it in his eyes.... a sadness... a heavy burden that crept into his eyes. I knew it all along and waited for the day when he felt he could tell me, the day he would say, " I have something to tell you." One of the comments asking why the parent just didn't ask and make it simpler for the child. I asked but the reply was "no". I knew then for sure .... because it wasn't "fu-- no way!!!" I still wanted to believe it wasn't true in my heart... but more than anythng I wanted my son to say it... accept it and be happy. I felt bad that he kept it to himself for 5 years. I wished he would have told me so I could have been there for him and helped him. I thought my husband would take the news hard; before our son came out my husband would make comments about gays and he, himself had been a big jock on campus when we were in high school. (yes, we were high school sweethearts!) My husband loves our son and really said nothing for the first 2 days after being told. It was then that I saw my husband cry for the firat time in 30 years. His tears were not because our son was gay, but for the pain our son would endure... the rude comments that would be said by others, the hurt he would endure from others ... and perhaps one day ... aids. I look back on the whole thing ... six years ago. Today we are so happy for our son and his beautiful boyfriend. We get together with our son, Robert and John about every 2 months. We are in a gourmet club with them; my husband and I, and about 12 gay men. We laugh.. we share good food, drink, tell stories and hug and kiss when we leave for the evening. We are so very fortunate that our son is happy and healthy; that is all parents really want for their children. I too am very grateful for my husband. We were walking around our home town one day and Robert and John were holding hands while they walked in front of us. I was a little nervous because I didn't want someone looking rudely at "our kids". My husband held my hand tight and said "I don't care what people think... The world is full of ignorant people." Those words meant so much to me. For all of you who may be afraid to tell your parents... they probably already know. If you tell them, it is possible they won't be angry; it may just be fear on their part. Fear for you or for you being hurt by others. Parents love their children... you are the reason for their living, for their breathing. I wish you the best... and will pray for your happiness in life and in health. I want to thank the author of the story, it was absolutely beautiful.

Jake

I can see echos of myself in this story.

I was a bright, happy and bubbly child, always smiling.

Keeping the secret that I'm Gay has taken it's toll over the years; but the happy child does sometimes resurface briefly.

I hope to tell my parents soon, I'm building the courage day by day. I want to bring the happy child back before he drowns completely.

It would be easier if they prompted me by saying they already knew, but I think that difficult as it may be I need to be the one to tell them...


I hope above all that they respond in a helpful and understanding way like this...

(Just found your blog - You have a new fan!)

Diamond Stud

You have a beautiful way of writing.

Thank you for inspiring me.

kev

your mom hit the nail on the head...emotional distance is the true cost of denial.

thanks for sharing this ethan.

Manu from Chile

I always look for your new posts. This one reminded me your old style & subjects on writting, and it made me cry again, like in old days...
Thank you for sharing your gift with us.
Please, keep doing it...

Harv Nagra

I commented on this post above. You have me hooked, just read all your entries that date back to the beginning of the year. Your stories seriously take my breath away. Amazing.

daniel

What a lovely tale. Beautifully done. I keep checking back, even though I wish you posted much more frequently.

William

Definitely worth the wait. This entry brought a tear to my eye. You know, I adore your blog... thank you for letting us in, Ethan.

An incredibly lucky mom, also.

My beautiful, funny, sensitive, loving gay son sent this story to me. So much of it mirrors all the feelings between myself and my son when he came out to me. I am so very thankful to have such a wonderful son. And I have also been very lucky to now be a part of several of his gay friends lives as some don't have the support of a loving family. Thank you for sharing.

CLIFF

ETHAN, I HAVE LOVED THIS SITE SINCE I FIRST STUMBLED UPON IT SEVERAL MONTHS AGO, AT THE SUGGESTION OF ETHAN OF BRATBOY FAME...I'M SO GLAD THAT I DID...I READ A PORTION OF THIS STORY ON ANDY'S SITE, AND WAS COMPELLED TO READ IT IN FULL...I'M GLAD THAT I DID...THERE WAS SO MUCH THAT I COULD RELATE TO: THE DISTANCE THAT I PUT UP BETWEEN MY FOLKS AND MYSELF;ENDURING THE JIBES AND TAUNTS;BEING RECLUSIVE;TRYING TO DATE GIRLS TO 'FIT' IN;EVENTUALLY SPEAKING WITH MY PARENTS IN THE KITCHEN AND CRYING MY EYES OUT, ONLY TO DISCOVER THAT THEY DIDN'T CARE, HAD ALWAYS KNOWN, AND LOVED ME UNCONDITIONALLY...HOW FORTUNATE WE ARE THAT WE HAVE LOVING PARENTS, WHO LOVE US NO MATTER WHAT...THANKS FOR SHARING THIS LETTER AND A PIECE OF YOUR HEART WITH ME...PEACE, CLIFF.

r*yan

thank you.

salvador

As always ethan, the finest writing of any blog out there, even when it comes from your mother.

Thank you and a warm hug to you both.

Karen

I've been reading this journal for months, for the writing (which is amazing), the romantic stories and general insight into your life and experiences. This post brings me out of lurkerdom because it moved me to tears. Words (well mine anyway) are inadequate to express the way it made me feel. It's just so good to read something so wonderfully positive that shows how it should be for all parents and their children. As a mother I love each of mine equally and unconditionally. How anyone could do otherwise is beyond my understanding. You haven't posted often enough lately, Ethan, but when you do it reminds us why we keep checking just in case. You have a gift. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Diane Vassallo

I knew my son was different from as early as the age of two. He had two brothers, at that ime who were just real boys. He like playing with different toys and he loved the girls. When he asked for things like "Easy Bake Oven", a shopping buggy, and a Cabbage Patch Doll", we obliged. As he grew his female traits became more apparent. I think this totally, confused him. He really tried to fit in with the boys and their games and activities. I enrolled him in soccor at the age of five. While the others were running around the field, chasing the ball, my son was picking dandlions, oblivious. The thing is, having a gay son is not different than having my three other sons. He has his interests and they have theirs. He is smart, loving and so much fun to be around. He is accepted by all of his family and friends and smiles alot. It really, really makes my blood boil to think that, as a civilization, we are smart and advanced enough to put men on the moon, but we can't prove that my gay son is genetic. How sick is that? Like my son has said; "If I was going to choose to be this different, why would I choose this?" As far as I am concerned, people who think my son or any other chose to be gay are just plain ignorant.

Mr. Bri

Absolutely beautiful. I never said those words to my mom, "coming out." But we talk about my life quite openly (I deign to say "my sexuality" simply because we don't focus on sex.). She acknowledges my partner as just that, and once jokingly referred to him as her daughter-in-law.

I'm glad your family has been supportive through the years. What baffles me to this day is those who aren't.

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